LET’S TALK ABOUT “IT”
Nusrat Jahan Progga
Yes, you probably have guessed it right. By “it” I mean sex. SEX. See? It’s not that hard to say it out loud. Now spell it “S.E.X”. Now say it out loud again.
And now you can have a moment to laugh at my ridiculousness.
The purpose of the above paragraph is to let you know that sex is not a big deal. I am not talking about your personal (or religious) view about it and this article is, in no way, about intimate relationships. What it is about, however, is the importance and urgency of getting rid of all the taboos surrounding the word “sex” and finally coming out of our rusty time bubbles.
First of all, here is a heartbreaking reality check to the over-protective brown skinned parents out there- stop being so afraid of uttering the word in front of kids, because chances are that they already searched the dictionary for the word when they were just 10 years old. Nowadays, with the transmission of information becoming smoother than ever and the world wide web growing even bigger, details regarding sex is everywhere. Children, especially teens and pre-teens, are curious about sex and they are always eager to find out more about it. However, how do you want them to acquire knowledge about this elusive deed? By watching or reading porn? Discussing with other kids their age? Or God forbid, something bad happens and then they find out!
You see, parents should be the ones to install the right concept of sex into the minds of their children as soon as they can, before they are misled by untrustworthy media.
With all that being said, let’s get into why sex education is important. According to statistics and some personal conversations with a lot of people, I found out that ALMOST every girl has been sexually harassed to some extent without them even understanding. They had no clue about what was going on because no one had taught them that it is wrong to touch someone intimately without their permission. They had to grow up and find out the hard way. When asked why they did not tell their parents after they realized what had been done to them, the most common answer was “No way! I can’t tell my mom!”
From a very young age, everyone around us forced us to believe that sex or anything remotely related to it (holding hands included, sadly) is bad. They even accomplished to make something as natural as menstruation something to be shy about. Hence, making it impossible for us to not be embarrassed and openly talk about things. Now think about it, was their an “uncle” your 7 year old daughter was always uncomfortable around? Someone she constantly ran away from? What if something bad had happened that made your precious child act that way? It’s a scary thought, isn’t it?
Tying our kids up with all these strict rules and regulations, we often forget that we are our children’s guardians. If something happens to them, they should be able to tell us, but they can’t. We pose, not as a parent or as a friend, but as an ATM booth who they should be afraid of.
With all due respect to our culture, I understand that sex before marriage is not appreciated and is always condemned. However, we are so adamant on hammering “sex is bad, don’t do it” into their heads, that we often forget to tell them that just like any normal human being, they might end up losing control. It is important that we teach them about the concepts of consent, respect, and protection/contraceptive. We also need to make them aware of the consequences, how to avoid them, and what to do if they make any mistakes.
If you have read this far, you have probably noticed the “Sex education starts at home” message this article has been maintaining. This is because, considering where we live, the only sex education we will get in school is the reproduction chapter of our 9th grade Biology books.
In conclusion, I would just like to say something to the parents on a wink-wink note: You do realize that this is more to your advantage right? Providing sex education to your child is a better way of instilling your family/religious values into their head instead of just telling them not to do it. Because after all children respond better to logic than they do to orders.